Today is wednesday and i have been forced to wake up by my lovely mother at 0530am. gosh, i think i'm still sleeping while typing this.And like any other day, i am still waiting patiently, a call from Mercedes to call me for duty.Damn it has been too long already, one single signature really can be a pain in the ass. As for other things, its been almost 1 year and a half that i have been together with you. Lately i have been a little turnover by our situation, of me, when you are thinking that i am not like what you are expected me to be, flirtatious to others. Well the truth is i just want to be friends with them. Well, maybe i got it carried away with stupid webcam and a foolish emoticons. And for that i am sorry.
From the bottom of my heart, i want the love sparks get into our heart again like we use to have in our honeymoon stage. Damn i miss those days syg. Eventhough i have to put up with sharing you with someone else. i do not mind all that cause i love you so much and i just want to be with you! you asked me to be cool and relaxed like i used to be,okay i will do that for the sake of loving you and you only. i try my best to play the role of a good girlfriend in this love stage, but i need to do the same for me as well. i will make you happy, and i know you're trying to make me happy as well. you said that i am a paranoia bitch. well i am! i just want to make sure that you not fall for others. not after what i have been through before.
one thing for sure, i just want those things passed me and become one bitter memory. because all i want to remember is now, our sweet memories. i want us to pampered ourselves with our love. i want you to be all spoil with me. i want to have a good laugh with you. i still remember how you smile made me so happy back then. a single smile can really make my heart melt. i think my heart is crying now.
i am not miserable now. i am happy that now you're with me. i just missed the good old days, when our lips touched softly and full with love and passion. when i kissed you, my heart flies up to the starry skies. dear darling, i love you so much. watching you go and saying goodbye to you someday would be the hardest thing in my life. it would feel like i am losing the people that i love go once again. just in case you do not want me anymore, like any other days that i have tell you before, just let me know. And i will do my best to let you go, even it take my life's strength to do that and just that.
finished at 0558am.
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